Substitute

You try to never hold a grudge
but this resentment just won’t budge
while forced to prettify the plate
of he who taught you how to hate:
his angry, sneering, pock-marked face
a memory you can’t erase
along with all the pointless pain
delivered with intense disdain,
unprepared to be abused
your confidence was badly bruised
which forced you to escape your hell
by crawling deep within a shell.
Traumatic times can be repressed
though someday they must be addressed
when startled by the bony frame
you thought you’d buried with your shame
for you were raised right from the start
to keep forgiveness in your heart
and while you try to figure how
your hospitality works for now.